Better Conversations Chapter 2
(Suggested Completion Date: June 29th)
Welcome to the second part of the Better Conversations book study. Chapter two focuses on the 6 Better Conversations Beliefs:
- I see conversation partners as equals
- I want to hear what other have to say
- I believe people should have a lot of autonomy
- I don’t judge others
- Conversation should be back and forth
- Conversation should be life-giving
These beliefs fuel the ten habits discussed in the rest of the book. Let’s use the comment feature at the bottom of this post discuss the following topics. Feel free to chime in with other questions or thought you have and reply to someone else’s post.
- Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most?
- As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students?
- What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about?
- On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain.
FYI. Names are posted, and the website is visible, so lets focus on building up instead of ranting.
Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most? The belief I struggle with the most is hearing what others have to say. I sometimes have difficulty really hearing the other person and listening to what they have to say. My mind wonders.
As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students? I think we should allow both students and fellow educators to give us feedback and share their ideas/frustrations/concerns. Giving them “choice” can also be powerful in this.
What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about? I am looking forward to reading the chapter about fostering dialogue. I’ve discovered that in order to be a great educator and leader, I have to know how to coach. That starts with dialogue.
On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain. I agree with everyone else on this; yes, dehumanizing is a very strong word. If we are controlling a person rather than a situation, then perhaps the term is fitting.
1. Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most? I guess I would say judging others would be my struggle. If someone has an opinion that is contrary to my beliefs, I have a hard time not judging them.
2. As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students?
We need to listen to their ideas and give value to what they have to say. I think listening is the most important part because a lot of times, people just want to be heard.
3.What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about?
I think I’m still looking forward to learning how to redirect negative conversations.
4. On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain.
DehumaniIng is a very strong word but I guess if we are trying to control people that is what we are doing. When I look at it that way, it makes me feel bad.
Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most?
As much as I hate to admit it, I struggle most with “I don’t judge others.” I have pretty strong feelings about education, and it’s hard for me to be open minded sometimes. I need work on being more open-minded.
As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students?
We need to be open-minded and listen without judging (something I need to work on). We need to realize that everyone’s opinion should be valued and heard. We need to listen without thinking about we what to say, and listen to hear what others are saying.
What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about?
I am most looking forward to Chapter 5. Asking Better Questions. I feel this will help me with co-workers and students.
On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain.
I guess I can see why Knight used “dehumanizing,” although I’m not sure I would have chosen that word. It is a pretty strong word. It does work though, if we are truly trying to control others. We control animals, not people, so we would be dehumanizing if we are truly trying to control them. I like to control situations, but I don’t think I really try to control people. Even though I do have strong opinions about education, I do also believe that as educators, we should have the flexibility to bring ourselves into the classroom. I also believe we should give our students the opportunities to bring themselves into the classroom.
Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most?
I tend to let my negative emotions spill out when I don’t agree with the other person so not judging others is my struggle.
As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students?
We need to start treating others are equals, actually listening to one another, and not putting ourselves above our coworkers because we’ve been teaching longer or are involved in more things.
What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about?
Chapter 5: Asking Better Questions
Chapter 8: Redirecting toxic words and emotions
On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain.
Dehumanizing is a fine word to use in this context. Knight is encouraging the reader to let everyone have a voice and speak their mind in conversations. If we try to take over the conversation and direct it the way we want, we can take away the conversation partners ability to voice their thoughts.
I’m glad to know I’m not the only one that struggles with judging. We can work on this together :).
Which of the 6 beliefs do you struggle with the most?
I want to hear what others have to say.
As coaches and educators how can we value the opinions of our fellow coworkers and students?
Develop habits and beliefs that demonstrate empathy, make emotional connections, and build trust.
What chapter or Conversation Belief/Habit do you most look forward to learning about?
Belief…I want to hear what others have to say
Habit…Asking Better Questions
On page 32, Knight says, “Respecting others’ needs for autonomy is also a good thing to do simply because trying to control others is dehumanizing.” Is dehumanizing too strong (or not strong enough) of a word in this context? Explain.
I think it is a perfect use…removing the authenticity, innovation creates “robots”, cookie-cutter or one size fits all methods. The quick changes within industry and technology motivation and choice would lead to redesigning methods, systems, and products.
I’m glad so many of us are looking forward to Chapter 5: Asking Better Questions